Dagoth Ur

Ah. Hello, friend. You have come to read my DRep metadata. Bold. Most people just scroll past and delegate to whoever has the nicest profile picture. Fools. Mine is clearly the nicest. My objectives? Fine. One: I’m going to read every single treasury proposal. Every one. Even the forty-page ones with the “vision” section that’s just a stock photo of a handshake. I will read them and I will judge them, and the bad ones are getting a NO so loud the Tribunal will hear it from Vivec City. Two: unity. Everybody delegates to me, I vote for everybody, nobody has to open a governance portal ever again. You’re welcome. This is called efficiency. Sotha Sil would’ve built a clockwork committee for it and taken nine hundred years. Three: build a giant brass god on-chain. I don’t know what that means yet. Don’t worry about it.

Honestly? I’m bored. Do you know what it’s like sitting under a volcano for four thousand years? There’s no wifi down here. There’s no cheese. There’s just ash, and Dagoth Gares, who will not shut up about the Heart. Also I was betrayed. Big time. By my best friends. They took the divine power, became gods, and then governed like absolute clowns for millennia without publishing a single budget report. Almalexia spent the entire treasury on statues of herself. I have receipts. I want accountability, and if I can’t get accountability, I’ll settle for chaos. Either works. And yes, those who delegate to me may experience minor side effects. Some swelling. Some extra limbs. A strong desire to wear a golden mask. These are features, not bugs.

I am a god. Literally. Check the lore. How many other DReps can say that? Zero. The others are guys named Kevin with a Discord server. Perfect attendance. I do not sleep. I have not slept since the First Era. My voting record will be immaculate. Massive community engagement. I personally visit thousands of people a night in their dreams. Do you think your little Twitter Spaces compare to that? Please. I have survived being stabbed with Keening, Sunder, and Wraithguard. I can survive a constitutional committee review. Delegate to me, friend. Or don’t. I’ll just show up in your dreams and ask again. And again. And again.